The Kindly Old Lady
There were twin brothers named Joe and John Jones. John was married. Joes was single, and had an old delapidated boat that he rented out.
On the same day that John's wife died, Joe's boat sank!
A few days later a kindly old lady met Joe on the street. Mistaking him for John she said; "OH MR. JONES, I AM SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR LOSS. YOU MUST FEEL TERRIBLE."
Joe answered by saying; "I'M NOT A BIT SORRY! SHE WAS A ROTTEN OLD THING. HER BOTTOM WAS ALL SHRIVELED UP AND SHE SMELLED LIKE DEAD FISH. EVERYTIME I GOT INTO HER SHE MADE WATER FASTER THAN ANYTHING. SHE HAD A BAD CRACK IN HER BACK, AND A PRETTY BIG HOLE IN FRONT. THE HOLE GOT BIGGER EVERYTIME I USED HER".
"WHAT REALLY FINISHED HER OFF WAS THE FOUR GUYS FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF TOWN LOOKING FOR A GOOD TIME. THEY ASKED IF I WOULD RENT HER TO THEM."
"I WARNED THEM SHE WASN'T TOO HOT, BUT THEY SAID THEY WOULD TAKE A CHANCE AT HER ANYWAY. THE RESULT WAS THE CRAZY FOOLS ALL TRIED TO GET INTO HER AT ONCE. IT WAS WAY TOO MUCH FOR HER AND SHE JUST CRACKED RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE."
THE KINDLY OLD LADY FAINTED!
|