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Your Jokes! Tell us your Funny's Here, NO RACIST STUFF PLEASE ....We all like good jokes.


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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 09-06-2007, 06:11 PM
Useek File Private First Class
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 6
Default probably bad jokes.. but i tried.....

This dog is acting bad

While waiting for a bus, the blind man's dog decided to go to the bathroom all over the blind man's legs.

A passerby commented to the blind man, "What! That dog just went to the bathroom all over your legs, and you are petting him?! Are you crazy?"

To which the blind man replied, "Madam, I am not petting him, I am feeling for his bottom, so I can kick him."


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Q: Why do seagulls live near the sea?
A: Because if they lived near the bay, they would be called bagels.

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This is one smart dog
A butcher is leaning on the counter toward the close of day when a dog with a basket in its jaws comes pushing through the door.

"An' wot's this then?" he asked. The dog knocks the basket sharply into the butcher's shins.

"You dumb dog." As he reaches down to smack the dog, he notices a note and a ten dollar bill in the basket.

The scribble on the note asks for three pounds of his best mince [ground beef]. The butcher figures this is too easy. He goes to the window and reaches for the dried up stuff that's been sitting out all day.

The dog growls at him. The butcher turns around and, glaring at the pup, gets the best mince from the fridge. Weighing out about 2 1/2 pounds, he drops in on the scale with his thumb.

"Hmmmmm, a bit shy. Who'll know?"

Again, the dog growls menacingly. "Alright, alright," as he throws on a generous half pound. He wraps it out, drops it in the basket, and drops in change from a five. The dog threatens to chew him off at the ankles. Another five goes in the basket.

The butcher is quite impressed and decides to follow the piddy pup home. The dog quickly enters a high-rise buildings, pushes the lift button, enters the lift, and then pushes the button for the 12th floor. The dog walks down the corridor and smartly bangs the basket on the door. The door opens, and the dog's owner screams at the dog.

"Hey, what are you doing? That's a really smart dog you've got there," comments the butcher.

"He's a stupid dog--that's the third time this week he's forgotten his key.
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  #2 (permalink)  
Old 09-06-2007, 06:33 PM
Useek File First Lieutenant
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 171
Default


Funny Thanks.
LOVE U ALL
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  #3 (permalink)  
Old 09-06-2007, 11:14 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Tucson Arizona
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that was great~~~thank you
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Old 09-07-2007, 12:20 AM
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Location: Malaysia,Sabah
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Laughing is good but if you can't stop you're dead and Im one hahahahahahahaha

great jokes
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Old 09-08-2007, 12:13 AM
Useek File Corporal
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Thailand
Posts: 11
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Thanks for sharing
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Old 01-20-2008, 01:56 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 3
Default funny lol

luv them
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Old 02-02-2008, 11:02 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Willagee, Western Australia, Australia
Posts: 13
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Fantastic dog jokes! What a laugh, what a riot, what a gut buster! Whooeee! I love it! C'mon, gimme more jokes! And is there any deaf jokes? I'll tell ya one!

Who's deaf?

No one?

ME!!!!


Ahahahahah!! How about that!

Good one, eh!
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